I’m Terrible at Keeping Up

Yeah. I keep forgetting to update this now. But honestly, now that I’m not doing the reset, I don’t have a lot to report every day. I’m back to my old habits of not tracking what I eat and eating whatever is conveniently around. And it shows. I haven’t lost since I stopped the reset. I haven’t gained a whole lot either, so I guess that’s good. Although the past few days have been horrible decision central, so I’m sure if I weigh myself today, there will definitely be a gain. Cafe food and lattes. An entire bag of M&Ms that was supposed to be the “shareable size”. I shared it with myself. A bottle of Coke. Donuts. Jelly Beans someone brought in at work. It’s been an all around junk food fest over here. I’m derailing all the work I did last month. I haven’t just fallen off the wagon. I drove it off a cliff, smashed it on the rocks, and I’m trapped in the middle of the fiery inferno at the bottom. I have to do better. I have to keep myself on track.

There has been a little positive in all of this. I have a drawer full of jeans and work pants that I used to wear all the time. And then I got too fat for them. So they sat there. Shirts hung in the closet that I no longer felt comfortable in because they were too tight. There’s one shirt in particular that I absolutely loved. It was the one I felt good in. The one I got complimented on every time I wore it. And then I gained 20lbs and it wasn’t a shirt anymore. It was a sausage casing. So it got shoved to the back of the closet again. I wore the same few outfits and the same 3 pairs of pants over and over again because they were the only ones that fit. It was depressing.

But the other day I took out a pair of the jeans I used to wear to try on. And they fit! They’re still a little tight, but they actually button now! And I’m getting closer to being able to wear the shirts that I’ve neglected again! So yay! Maybe as a reward for being able to wear my old clothes again, I’ll go by myself some new ones too.

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